Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
