best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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