I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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