So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
