All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize