im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize