this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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