Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
