I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
