I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
