Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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