So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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