found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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