Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
