Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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