Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Randomize
