Screwed.edu
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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