She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
