wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
