It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
