You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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