all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
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