You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Randomize