How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize