dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize