what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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