I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
home. puking in laundry basket.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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