It's Friday. Sex?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
The struggles of a small town man whore
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
