If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
