Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
