i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
