Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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