Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
