why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
