Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
