I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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