porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
