whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
