Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
