I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
