i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
