just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he fucked my hip out of place.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
