she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
