Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize