hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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