ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
