He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
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