Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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