he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
