It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i just made my gag reflex go away.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I checked into jail on foursquare
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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