we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
