I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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